Technical Difficulties

I’m baaaaack!!   : )    Now that I’ve had my dessert of frosted flakes & bananas, I think I can settle down and start purging like a bulimic.  Don’t get your knickers in a twist, I meant with words people! LOL  I don’t think I’ll have to “purge” a great deal, I just have to say what’s on my mind and there’s a difference. I’m not beset with so many things I can’t handle them, just enough things to make me sigh very loudly and try to figure out a way to dig myself out of this huge-ass hole I’m in. Financial hole, that is.

I woke up this morning to my DVR not working, which sucks out loud because I have satellite TV. I tried to reset and it didn’t work so I called my provider and they figured out that I need to 86 my POS (that’s piece of shit, for those not in the know) DVR and upgrade. I’ve had the stupid thing since 2006 and the one in my son’s room took a dump too. Had that one since 2007 so I plan on upgrading both. Figured as long as I was at it, I’d get one for the mother-in-law too because she really does an awful lot for us. Anyway, because I have a past due amount of $170 and something, they can’t send out the technician for my upgrades until I pay the past due amount. I have no issue with that but the problem is, I won’t have any money until four days from now. Yeah, boo on that.

Even when I get my money, it goes right through my hands like water through a sieve.  Oh wait, it gets better…I can’t do a whole lot of job interviews because my radiator is leaking (in case I hadn’t already mentioned it) so I can’t drive my ragged-out but trusty SUV; I have to drive Van Damn, the old piece of junk van my would-be ex used to drive. Hey, it’s wheels and I shouldn’t complain, I know. My son cleaned it out today and it actually looks pretty good. I just can’t take it too awfully far or the tranny will start slipping if it gets too hot. I know, we’re a Jeff Foxworthy joke waiting to happen. I can accept that though.

As I said in one of my earlier posts, we aren’t what you’d call a conventional household, what with me being quasi-married and living in a separate part of the house, plus my mother-in-law is in house as well. Actually, she owns the “house” (it’s a double-wide…yes, I’m a double-wide diva). We couldn’t afford to do it ourselves and our credit was shit…hers was near perfect sooooo…you get the idea. Anyway, since I usually always earn more income than anyone else in the house (read: my would-be ex husband), I pay half the mortgage every month. All three of us share the cost of the groceries so when the mom in law goes a-shoppin’, she puts the receipts on the bar in the kitchen and I tally them up every two weeks, just like when I had a normal job and got paid every two weeks. So now that you kinda get the bigger picture, I’ll just do a quick run-down of what I normally pay on a month to month basis. Here we go:

$300 mortgage, $170 satellite bill, $80 internet/hm phone,  $200 cell phone (avg.), $30 water, $120 electric (avg), $191 car ins. This totals $1,091 which should be no prob, right? Wrong. Because that’s not all of what I actually pay, that’s the average monthly cost of the major bills. The electric can fluctuate, of course, depending on whether it’s summer or winter. We finally got a more efficient unit, thanks in part to my son. He has a friend whose father works with commercial A/C and heating units. He came and installed a new thermostat as a favor and a couple months later, had to come install a new motor in the 23 yr. old monster that finally gave out. I couldn’t even pitch in for the motor and total for that was over $200. But wait, there’s more…I also pay about $45/mo. to the pawn shop so I don’t lose the jewellry my mom left me, some of which has been in there for 2 yrs. Hey, you do what you gotta do to cover your ass, y’know? Then there’s the $40/mo. for my Zoloft so I don’t have an anxiety attack or shitfit or whatever you want to call it. I’m supposed to be taking meds for my osteoporosis but can’t afford it. One friggin’ pill is $75 w/o insurance. No, I’m not done yet. Junior has a tooth that needs a root canal but again, no coverage. I scraped enough money together to get him to the dentist but don’t have enough to pay for the antibiotics or the painkillers to get him through until I actually get coverage. Unemployment pays me $1,624 per month total and believe it or not, it isn’t enough. At least the money is available or lots of folks would be SOL.

If you’re still with me, bless you…you’re a trooper indeed. Somewhere in this quagmire of bullshit and past due bills, I need to pull money out of my ass to fix my radiator so I have a moderately dependable way to a job I haven’t found yet. On the plus side, my 72 yr. old mother-in-law is very good at fixing small mechanical things on an automobile. Matter of fact, she’s fixed some of the holes in the crap floors we have, as we can’t pay someone else to do it. Hey, she’s retired, might as well. She likes that sort of thing and there’s no way in hell my would-be ex will do any of that. Just not his cuppa tea and he’s more likely to do it half-assed anyway. But somehow, we all make this dysfunctional house work together. Grace of God and necessity, I guess. Just glad I have a good relationship with my son…when he’s home. Oh well, he’s 17 and it’s to be expected. Hell, I’m in my mid 40’s and I don’t wanna stay home much either.

So I’m done for now. I’m feeling a pb&j with a cold glass of milk about now, while I watch some Eureka and Haven online. Gotta love the internet. ‘Til next time,

    & hair grease, y’all!

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